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Texas Floods + Epstein Files = Perfect News Cycle Management Cover

Texas Floods + Epstein Files = Perfect News Cycle Management

A savage, darkly hilarious satire praising the “genius” timing of the DOJ’s “no Epstein client list” bombshell during the Texas flood tragedy.

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Mukbang for World Peace: Why Watching People Stuff Their Faces Will End Global Conflict Cover

Mukbang for World Peace: Why Watching People Stuff Their Faces Will End Global Conflict

A riotously dark, layered satire arguing that synchronized global mukbang viewing is the key to world peace—because nothing unites humanity like watching strangers inhale 10,000 calories for likes. Spoiler: The only thing thinner than these influencers is the line between entertainment and existential despair.

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M3GAN 2.0: When Your Doll Has More Personality Than the Villain (and You) Cover

M3GAN 2.0: When Your Doll Has More Personality Than the Villain (and You)

A Review So Honest, Even M3GAN Would Hack It For a Rewrite

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Let's Melt All the Glaciers—Who Needs Ice Anyway? Cover

Let's Melt All the Glaciers—Who Needs Ice Anyway?

A savage, satirical manifesto arguing that glacier melting is humanity's greatest achievement and ice is just nature's way of hoarding water. Spoiler: Your frozen margaritas are doomed.

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Let’s Replace All Prisons With Reality TV—Crime Pays, If You’re Entertaining Cover

Let’s Replace All Prisons With Reality TV—Crime Pays, If You’re Entertaining

A blistering, satirical manifesto demanding the abolition of prisons in favor of televised criminal gladiator games, where freedom is won through audience votes. Spoiler: Your trauma is prime-time content.

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